Corkonians Abroad: Williamsburg is warm and close-knit...'it kind of feels like home'

Where are you from?

I am from Carrignavar, a small but picturesque village north of Cork city.

Growing up, it always felt quite slow-paced and rural, I the excitement of waiting for the 2pm Saturday bus into the city and getting the 6pm bus home with the girls. That three hours in the metropolis that is Cork city was always such a buzz! I loved it and quickly moved to College Road for a few years after the Leaving Cert when I studied at UCC.

Even now, when I College Road, I laugh to myself at all the memories - so many amazing parties, people, and adventures!

I am lucky to have maintained very close relationships with my friends from Carrig’ school and College Road to this day! I am so grateful to have met such warm-hearted, genuine, and fun-loving friends.

Where do you currently live?

I live on the Williamsburg Waterfront in Brooklyn, New York, with my husband Grant and daughters Genevieve and Juliette.

Williamsburg is a neighbourhood in the New York City borough of Brooklyn, it is a cultural melting pot with an interesting mix of Hasidic Jews, influencers and young families.

It is a notoriously trendy neighbourhood; I like it for its strong Irish community, its scenic waterside promenade, and close proximity to the city (just a few short minutes by ferry)

How did you end up in New York?

After several years of working in the city and saving, we decided to buy our first family home in Brooklyn. It was actually a very pragmatic choice - back in 2020 we took advantage of the historically low mortgage rates (New York was dead! ?) and the Williamsburg Tax abatements (zero property taxes) to buy here.

Despite these very boring motives, moving to Williamsburg to nest and start a family was a wonderful decision - the community is so warm, welcoming and close-knit, with many Irish and other Europeans - it kind of feels like home.

What is life like in your new home?

Williamsburg is incredibly vibrant - with loads of fun activities for family days, date nights, and everything in between.

I love that everything is walkable and that everyone knows each other by name - it kind of reminds me of Cork in that way.

What has been the biggest challenge?

After we got married, my husband finished law school and sat the New York Bar while I completed my doctorate at New York University and opened my own practice - it was a very gruelling few years of toil.

When you focus too much on the work, life loses its joy, playfulness and adventure. You can become rigid, overly goal-oriented, and, to be honest, not very fun!

Restoring balance was a challenging period of transition for me. Once we completed what we needed to do, we had to learn to slow down, enjoy life again, spend time with friends, and spend more time together, and reignite our joie de vivre.

As I get older, I realise more and more that success is not about accolades - it is about the small, nameless moments while sitting across from someone you love, chatting, laughing and having meaningful conversation - it’s about the quality of your relationships, and how deeply you can love and be loved.

How might you spend your weekends?

I start most mornings with a hot powerlifting pilates class before the kids are awake, luckily it’s just two minutes walk from our home so it makes it easy to squeeze in. The studio has great music and lighting so it reminds me of my clubbing days in Cork! I look forward to going.

Then, we have a tradition of making almond croissants every weekend - it fills the kitchen with a delicious buttery scent that I simply adore and now associate with the weekend.

The girls both have ballet class and swim lessons every weekend - and there is often kids’ birthdays, play-dates, and other gatherings in between.

We have great friends in the area, so getting the kids together feels like a social gathering for the parents too!

If we are lucky, we will also squeeze in a date night. We like to take turns organising and surprising the other. New York always offers novelty and off-Broadway shows/comedy shows can be surprisingly affordable.

Tell us about your line of work/career?

I am an author, psychotherapist and teach at New York University (NYU). I’ve spent my whole career treating survivors of trauma and I’ve noticed that it’s the pain that people endure from their relationships that causes the deepest wounds.

No-one is born believing themselves unworthy of love, respect, or comfort; unworthiness is learned through painful life experiences. This death by a thousand cuts is the subtle yet deeply painful experience of complex trauma.

There’s a quote from Michelangelo that I love: “I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.” Like Michelangelo, my life’s work has focused on chiselling away at the unresolved trauma of my clients, cautiously dismantling their defence mechanisms and fears, and gently peeling back the layers of shame to unveil the ‘authentic self’ buried beneath, patiently waiting to be rediscovered and embraced.

It’s a privilege to earn a client’s trust, to hear the vulnerability in their voice, and to witness them reconnect with their authentic self. The journey isn’t easy, but it’s profoundly rewarding.

I primarily use EMDR to treat complex trauma. It stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing, and offers a powerful way to process trauma by allowing individuals to gently revisit painful memories while staying grounded in the present.

What has been your most memorable moment in your new location so far?

Bringing our babies back to our home - it was the culmination of two wishes fulfilled.

We were together 13 years before we managed to pay for a wedding and a family home and begin our family - during that time you start to wonder if it will happen, if there may be complications, and if it was right to wait and feather your nest before having a family.

When it did all come together, I felt immense relief and joy.

Any special mentions to friends or family back in Cork?

Yes! A special hello to my parents, Timmy and Kathleen O’Shea in Carrignavar, my brother Jack and his fiancé Rosie, who are expecting a little boy in a few months - I am very excited to fly home and meet him!

My brother Timmy and sister Joanna are also living abroad with their families.

But I also want to wish a special hello to all my Cork-based friends, and especially the godmothers to my children - Kate Healy and Caroline Glennon (nee Healy) - sending so much love to all of you.

If you were back in Cork for one day, what would be the ideal day for you?

Spending time with family and friends; having some of my favourite Irish treats: Clonakilty pudding, Ballymaloe relish, and Taytos of course, followed by a stroll down Pana!

Outside of that though there is a special pier in Ballycotton that my father showed me; it feels like the most peaceful corner of the world - there are so many scenic locations in Cork, we are really spoiled for choice.

What are you looking forward to in the coming months?

I will be releasing a new book with Harper Collins - it blends Greek myth with psychology and offers an immersive healing experience to readers with its accompanying card deck and workbook.

I have always been captivated by the power of myth, and how it showcases the resilience of the human spirit in navigating the depths of despair and strives for lofty aspirations.

Each chapter blends together a myth with the psychological theory. Myth is a treasure trove of cautionary tales, epic dramas in which characters undergo personal evolution, confront adversity, and pursue enlightenment.

While in ancient myth, the hero had to slay a monster, in real life, we must conquer what lies within.

The emotional quest of evolving to overcome the struggle can serve as a compelling invitation for growth and evolution. It involves inner alchemy, transforming wounds into wisdom, shame into self-forgiveness, and pain into purpose, and finally reaching harmony, enlightenment, and self-realisation.

It will be real pinch-me moment to finally see it in hard copy on the shelves!

Dr Gillian O’Shea Brown is a psychotherapist, adjunct professor at NYU, and EMDRIA approved consultant. Her work on the treatment and healing of complex trauma (relational trauma) has been featured internationally in Forbes, Marie Claire, Huffington Post, Vogue, Wondermind, Inc. Magazine, and elsewhere.

For more updates on her book launch, you can find her on all the usual platforms @dr.gillianosheabrown